I am going to have to start reading a whole different kind of parenting book now! Yesterday, Spindles asked if he could walk our dog with me. When we had set off, and I just asked how he was going, I could hear there were tears in his voice. He said that things between him and Roly have changed. They used to be in the same friendship group at their old school. But here they mix in totally different crowds. Spindle's group plays handball, and Roly's friends (both goups), well they all like girls, and in fact there are several girls in their group. This is such a hugechange for Roly (who was totally allergic to girls the last two years), so Spindles is not coping. He said that Roly also mentioned to a mutual friend from their old school, that he is interested in girls. With that heads up,I had a little meander down to Roly's room later that night to see where he is at with all this. He said that there is a lot of 'going out' and then 'breaking up' that goes on in his class, and that a couple of his friends want him to 'go out' with one of a couple of the girls in their group. He asked how I would feel about him dating and taking a girl out.
Oh Lord, give me wisdom! I know what I want for Roly. I want for him to always treat girls with respect, and to never start going out with a girl under the influence of others, only to break up a couple of days later, and have her wonder for ages, what was so wrong with her. I want him to only seek a life partner who shares his faith. I want to lock him up in his room and homeschool him till he is 23!!!!!!!!
:( Well, in a very calm voice I have told him that Dad and I will get back to him on our guidelines when it comes to him dealing with girls. I think I was 17 when a boy took me to a movie. We will certainly encourage him to bring friends home to meet us, maybe it may sometimes be a girl, and they could talk out on the tramploine where I can spy see them . At some stage we will let him go to movies with a group that may include girls, but I am quite convinced that at this very young age, he kind of needs protection from himself, and to have the decision taken out of his hands.
We need to be firm, without trampling all over his heart.
I will take any of your ideas with open ears and mind! And keep Spindles in your prayers. he does not take change well! he still thinks he will live at home with us forever and ever!