Can I preface this post by saying that in matters of disciplining one's offspring, I have learned not to judge other people on their parenting methods and disipline. It is so easy to parent other people's kids, isn't it?! In our minds. LOL! When our kids were smaller, Hubby and I were definitely in the Spanker's corner when it came to administering swift consequences for outright disobedience. But as our kids have grown older, the withholding of privileges such as computer and TV times works a treat. That is a very brief summary of course of what we have chosen to do discipline-wise, and I would love to hear what any of y'all do or did with your tribe in this area. Feel free to open up, I am sure no one is going to call you out on your methods. We all do our best, and, as far as I can tell from my friends and family, we all tend to parent either in accordance with or in reaction against how we were parented ourselves!
So that is just the preface for a very small post really. LOL!
I have always given Topsy a little deterring smack on the hand when he has wilfully disobeyed me. ( I say 'I' because I am the 'at home' parent ' and Hubby is the 'good cop'!!!!) And I have found that this little smack has done very little to deter anything! EEEKs! In fact sometimes, he will go and do a 'naughty thing' then come over with a big grin and his hand held out for his smack, so he can get that over with and get on with his disobedience in peace, thankyou very much! I think I have grown soft in my old age, and my smacks are actually more taps. So I have just started time-outs. I must say, I had absolutely no idea how to tell a child that the the consequence of his particular infringement required him to please sit in a corner with his back to us!
My first opportunity to try came last Wednesday. We were in church, 'cause I was packing up from kid's club now that we are in holidays. It is his second home, and I usually have kid's worship songs going and we have a great old time, packing up or setting up. So I had told him to stop getting out the communion cups and to stop trying to skull the bottle of annointing oil. He waited until he caught my eye, and carefully continued to jiggle the crystal bottle of annointing oil with a develish grin! So I placed him firmly in a corner and said: 'Sit, Topsy! Sit down!' He got up chuckling! Mummy must be joking!!
I put him firmly back. 'Topsy, you stay sitting!..... No sit! (putting him back down into the required position.) It took about 4 more returns to his time out corner, before he gave in nd sat there, sniffling a little. Then after 30 seconds (that is long enough right, for a not-quite-two year old?)we were reunited joyfully, after remembering why he had been put there again. And since then, time out has worked. I have only used it a couple more time, but when I placed him in time out this afternoon, I was amazed at how accepting he has been of this form of correction. I bet you guys are all thinking : What is she on about? We do time out all the time. Duh!!! But see, 6 years have passed since I last had a toddler. And with my terrible memory, I couldn't remember how to do any of that stuff.
Doing this was a big thing for me!
So any of your ideas or tried-and-trues, I will certainly take on board.
Well, must go. I am in the middle of cooking an Indian feast for my parents coming tomorrow! Robby, read no further, please! it will be too painful for you!
Aloo Gosht (a delectable lamb curry with panfried potatoes in it)
Fried potatoes with garlic and chillies
Cucumber raita (to dip the potatoes in)
Spiced beans and carrots tossed in sesame seeds
Tarka Dhal (spiced lentils!)
And no, I am not cooking like that every night my parents are here. I have felt a hankering for Indian for a while now, and this is a good excuse! Mum and Dad will be here over the Easter weekend. So I will hopefully post a couple of pics of that adventure!
Got to go wash my hands; my nose is burning from where my chilli-covered fingers picked it!
School Holidays at the moment for three weeks. We are not going anywhere. This first week we have had Mum and Dad pass through one night, and then had a friend stay for two nights. He is a concierge/ actor in Sydney, and a comitted Christian. It is a funny balance he gets taking care of famous people all the time (Jennifer Aniston, Joss Stone, Keith Urban etc.) and seeing the downside of fame. Keeps him very grounded.
THe kids and I are taking it in turns to choose a game to play each day. Today Spindles chose Blackjack, which I had never played before, but was actually a real hoot! He learned it at school! Then I chose Spoons, which Roly complained about at first ('we said one game a day, not two!'), but it was a lot of fun.
Tomorrow I am going to try to sneak in another extra game: Dutch Blitz. Have you played that? Isn't it fun!?!
We also did a massive cleanup of the back yard's shed. It took a lot of work, but was well worth it.
We have no chickens anymore. A brown snake finished off the last one. :(
We are hopefully adopting the duck and rooster out, and will then only have 3 four legged friends left.
I must say, it has been a joy to see how beautifully our cat Mischief as taken the kitten on as her own. It was a shaky start, and he terrified her at first, but now she is enthralled. Everything is a game to Thomas Ploop, and Mischief just follows him around to see what he is going to do next. He chases her tail till she pounces on him and gives him a good spanking. Then they snuggle up together and he tries to suckle from her.